void of existence

I met up with S1 yesterday.  Things are still in a blur, but it seems like it is moving towards the right direction. 

I learn a lot about her.  Its her words, of coz.  But I believe her.

Today, she dropped by while B2 and myself are having our regular lunch salad. We shall see.

She is not perfect.  She has flaws.  She haunched a bit.  She has a strange lingo usage.  She is too slim.  She apologises too much. 

But she is adorable.  She cares.  She recipocrates.

Been busy last few days.  Productive sort of busy, so I am happy.  I wanted to write about this for the last couple of days but just havent found the time. 

Aura.  Everyone has it.  Have you ever notice that you will inevitably notice someone in a crowd?  That someone has a X factor about them.  Its not just how they look or what they are wearing.  Its just like they give out a sort of energy that emits an attraction mechanism. 

I notice that in a couple of people recently.  They are always confidence and sometimes arrogant.  But they are always the leader.  Not just being loud.  I know of people, who are loud, but just doesnt have that aura. 

It is interesting when 2 persons of such aura debate on a topic that they dun agree with.  The discussion goes beyond their words.  It can be felt in the air. 

I am now studying these people who emits such aura.  What is the basic characteristics that they have.  One day, I will have that as well.  The X factor.  The Aura of Power.

Today I followed what my boss would have done.  I threw a $2 note for $1.85 worth of beverage when the guy in front of me took his time in paying his grocery and then the maid took another item for payment after he has settled his main load of grocery.  Its stupid to just stand there and wait while they chit chat.

People should bring their wallet out.  NRIC is important to be kept near the person.  At least the photocopy of it.

I went for a haircut today.  Apple was her usual jovial self.

Met Chin for dinner.  Turned out to be quite a fun dinner. 

Thinking about EJ2 a bit.  Sucker, I am.

I have learnt a number of things today.

I am critical about mistakes.  Even though I can accept the mistakes made by others, I am noticing those mistakes so that I will not make the same mistakes myself.  I need to remember that.  Being critical is ok, as long as it is not just saying someone else is doing something wrong, and I go repeating the same blardy thing.

Event management is best to let someone else do it.  If you are a host, you should let another person worry about the details.  This goes for weddings, anniversaries, etc etc.  As a host, the main function is to be happy and enjoy the party.  Not to worry about the nitty gritty.  Even someone as experienced as Elder1 is 'stressed' under those circumstances.  In any event, almost always that some details will go amiss.  There is nothing wrong with that.  No use in getting frustrated about it as long as the show can go on.  Its recovery of this missing details that show how good an event manager is.  Event management is not as easy as it sounds.  It is an entire field of specialization.  Being buried or flustered by the details is the bane of a good event manager.  Disrespecting this area of specialization is just like asking a cobbler to do syndication for a listed MNC or a banker to tailor an Armani suit.

Social conventions are a necessary expectation to be part of a group.  While I do agree that I should not impose my social convention on someone else, there is nothing to stop hanging out with someone who does not fit into my social convention.  I am really upset by the behaviour of a greenhorn bro (GH1) this evening.  First of all, in a social function, we need to know how to control ourselves.  We need to learn how to be a good drinker.  That is after we get high or get drunk to behave appropriately.  Anyone can get drunk if everyone else in the party is out to meet that objective.  Then, we need to not impose ourselves on others.  But if we are imposing, we need to learn how to be graceful about it and be appreciative rather than trying to win the Annual Most Stubborn award.  I made a promise to myself that I am distancing myself from GH1.  Inexperience is forgiveable, but stubborn stupidity is not.  I was made to ride with a drunk stubborn ass.  I have stopped drinking long before the event ended and is in a much condition to drive.  But instead, he insist on driving.  Never will that happen again.  If I offer to drive coz a person is drunk and he refused, then that's it.  I am not going to get into the same car as them when they are driving.  We almost crashed into 2 cars on the way.  He is totally clueless in the darker side of human activities. 

Talking about stubborness, I have also encountered the most moronic thing today that Sis1 is not good with direction.  She likes racing and sucks in road direction.  Go figure that out.  Once again, not knowing the road is not a crime, but at least listen when someone is trying to explain to you.  'I don't know, I am not good with road direction.' as an reply to every single direction is just a pissed off.

Back to GH1, how would you like it if someone keeps throwing things towards you for no reason?  First, it was a lighted cigar.  Then it was a piece of cake.  Then it was peanuts.  After that was his hand in front of my face.  I do not know about anyone else.  But he really need to learn to behave himself when high.  He is a lousy drunk.  He has just hit 0points on my scale.

While I enjoyed the events today, I was disappointed at this person.

Another issue that was brought up was B2's upcoming wedding.  I was told today that the survey done was everyone was worried.  In the mildest form of objection, he is not ready for marriage.  I notice something about her some time ago that really irritates me.  Its none of my blardy business and I do not have to deal with it.  She likes to play on guilt.  The 'who is the people who are late' and 'who is the one who did this or that' is just stupidity.  Woman..use your brain.  You will be lucky if you are getting away coz the bros respecting you out of keeping peace with the bro.  Its like Elder2's wife.  Everyone finds her irritating, so eventually everyone start isolating Elder2, coz he likes to bring her along for activities.  In the end, Elder2 is losing bros, and he gets more grumpy about life in general.  Being socially accepted is not just for the sake of making people like you or your spouse.  It is a necessary maintenance in a relationship.  I really would like to meet that wedding counsellor and tell him 'You are a blardy scam.  You have absolutely no idea what is going wrong.  You are a typical idiot who did not even see the tip of the ice berg.  Singapore weather too warm, ice berg already melted.  Your problem is now the farking sea!' 

I hate people criticizing her.  I just do.  It doesnt matter what happened.  It doesnt matter at all.  I am not living in any delusion that there is any possibility there.  There is none.  I know that very well.  Things are different.  She has left, with a davastation path so wide that no imagination can reach.  It doesnt matter.  I have moved on, but it is almost an insult to the memories of the past when there is criticism.  What happen then is over.  No one has the rights to criticise it.  Not even me.