void of existence

Vicky has developed lumps in her bladder. She is now having blood in her urine.

On Sunday, the pet clinic decided to play a game of Amazing Race with me. First, I picked up Vicky from Pasir Ris at 1.45pm. Drove to her to the Mount Pleasant Clinic at East Coast. We saw the vet at 2.30pm. This is where the DETOUR came.

A Detour presents the team with a decision between two tasks, “each with its own pros and cons”.

1) We can do a blood test and a X-ray and get a general diagnosis. or

2) We can do a blood test and an ultrasound scan.

The X-ray is cheaper but it cannot identify certain properties. So we chose the Ultrasound scan. We can do it at 4pm that day. The catch is that we have to do it at the hospital.

So we drove from Katong to Mount Pleasant Hospital at Steven Road. At 2.50pm, the clinic staff sent us to the night clinic waiting area (next door) as that is where the ultrasound is done. At 3.15pm, Vicky was sent in for the Ultrasound scan. At 3.55pm, the nurse told us the U-TURN.

A penalty differs from the Yield in that the affected team loses no specific amount of time, but instead they must complete the Detour task which they did not just previously complete

We have to go back to the clinic in Katong for the diagnosis. And we have to get back before 4.30pm. The hospital vets next door will not be able to assist us because that would means a U-TURN that they will have to re do the diagnosis and re-do the ultrasound scan. (Huh?? thats what the nurse said!)

The U-turn differs from the Yield in that the affected team loses no specific amount of time, but instead they must complete the Detour task which they did not just previously complete

Being in a hurry, we didnt question and just drove back to the clinic at Katong. At least we are given a FAST FORWARD to see the vet.
Vet said that the blood test is good but the ultrasound scan showed lumps in the bladder and stones in the gall bladder.

Here we are given 3 options:

1) GA. Surgical removal of the lumps to test if it is a malignant cancerous growth.

2) Hospitalize Vicky on a normal weekday. (Yes, we have to come back). And they will conduct a number of tests, which has 70% accuracy, without the surgery.

3) Medication for 1 week and see if Vicky’s condition improve. Then do another ultrasound scan.

The vet must have spent too much time with animals. I can hardly understand the options given. I had to think my way through it a few times before I got it. Anyways, this is just a PIT STOP. We will have to continue this after one week of medication.

Moral of the story: Pet clinic can only do normal vaccinations, cough, bandages, blood test, preventive medication, infection. Those that need ultrasound scan and X-ray…go to the Pet Hospital. It will save lots of running around.

Over the weekend, I deleted a number of phone numbers stored in my phone.

Saying that ‘I do not understand girls’ will probably bring a number of ‘huh..you only realised it now?’. My recent exercise of maintenance is to rid my phone and other devices of numbers of people whom I have classified as ‘Number of Frustration’. These are the numbers where you can call til Kingdom comes and no one will ever answer. And all of them..you guessed it…are girls. You would think that a person, with a sms or a missed call on their phone, will have the courtesy to return the call/sms. But no. There is no such courtesy.

This is almost a signal of ‘I do not want to talk to you…ever. Please get out of my life.’ Well, my life is going on fine without these little irritations. Thank you for saving space on my phone. So have a good life. Good bye.

No one need unreliable friends. Fair weather friends aside.

Spoke to a friend today. She is wishing that her husband can be more sensitive to her needs. Keep her company more often. She complained that her husband does not seem to be interested in sex coz he never initiate any more. She wished that she had gotten a rich husband in the beginning so that she doesnt have to work.

I am really puzzled with this attitude. This is not the only girl who I have come across. Is it because the parents have been doting them too much? Why do so many girls wished for a rich husband, who can spend their time at the beck of a call and shower them with attention and undying love. Did they learn this from a course during seminar that the school pulled them aside while the guys continue with the extended recess?

My question is what are the girls contribution to the relationship if they can in fact find a man who is marrying type, rich, caring, loving, answer to her every need at the drop of a dime, physically attractive and sensually sensitive?

Having a rich husband – The girl will probably be bored to death from day to day, high tea to pedicure… she will become a nag. So there is no real contribution there. There is only 2 possible things to become … fat and naggy.

Being attractive – What makes the guy so attractive that other girls will not notice? Other girls will want a piece of this guy too, wun they? Maybe the contribution here is that the girl in question is also attractive…but this will fade, no?

Sex – Hmmm… I dun know. Why girls expect the guys to be sensitive to their needs? I was told this ‘He cant expect me to just turn on once he starts touching me, right?’ What do you expect as an answer? Are you good in bed to begin with?

In the end, I guess these girls are just going to stress themselves out. They still have this teenager mentality of dating…

After the age of 30, the market of single bachelors diminishes. Of course, the secondary (divorce) market is the only other option to being single for the rest of their lives.

This morning I heard on the news that the 7th Storey building is going to be demolished in the name of progress. This is really upsetting for me.

Someone who sms the radio station mentioned that he was still sore about the national library. Another person said that it is no wonder that Singaporean youth are dissociated from the Singapore society when we keep taking about cultural and historical values (or landmark).

Let me tell you an recent experience during my trip to Vancouver in Canada. The impression of the place was that it is young, advance and refreshingly green. During my visit, I went to Stanley Park and took the horse pull carriage tour. The narrated tour guide was boring as she recite the prepared script of the tour. However, what strike me was some building structures still being used for its original purpose. Like the Vancouver Rowing Club which is established in 1886 or the Brockton Cricket Club. The 2 buildings were described as if 1 century of history is still so very young. The way that we can hear the history and be at the actual place where the history took place is just immensely meaningful. It is as different as I tell you now of the history of those places and show you photos of them. You have to feel the atmosphere. You have to smell the air. You have to be there.

Of course, you can say that the 2 places above are part of a national park and are probably there because of some preservation law. Well, there are other examples of places around a modern city in other places of the world that took their historical and cultural landmarks into their modern setting.

Look at our Haw Par Villa, it is built for the reason of teaching moral value….and advertisement….but it had been left to its own ruin because the Tourist Board is unable to create revenue from it. So we let this part of our culture to rot, rather than continue being part of our story. We look around the city and we are left with only 2 war memorials, a cinema which no longer in used (Capitol), another cinema that left only a unrecognizable face in front being converted into a shopping mall (Cathay), a post office building that has been converted into a hotel…and whatever else. We only retained a shell of the past. We have no standing history. We can say ‘Look, that building that used to be there was used for this and that purpose in the 50s to 60s, now its a shopping mall…cool huh?’. Is it the same as ‘This is the exact street that my parents and I used to grew up in. Look at tree…its the same one that I grew in primary 4.’?

Preservation is more than keeping an empty shell. It should be done to preserve the spirit of the place.

In a recent conversation, I was told that eating frogs, rabbits and other cute little animals are inhumane. In fact, I was told that eating animals is disgusting. From a program on Discovery Channel, hamburgers are causing much of ‘Greenhouse’ woes. The reason is that besides the transportation, cooking, wastage…the cows, that are reared, are giving out a lot of methane gas. Ya…they fart a lot.

It was said that there are other methods of getting what we need..like multi-vitamins pills. My belief is that popping pills is pretty unnatural. Imagine a pill is formed by breaking down the compound into its simplest form and being compact into this small little pill. The following is said to be the breakdown of a human being at about 70Kg taken from http://web2.iadfw.net/uthman/elements_of_body.html:

If we take all of the above and put it in a jar, can we call it a human being?  Just because a pill contains an element of what we need, it does not mean that our body can absorb that element in its breakdown form.  Like oxygen, we all need oxygen, right?  If we really breathe down pure oxygen, we would literally combust.

This lead to the conversation about traditional medicine to modern medication. Modern medication has its place in the world. But it only has its impact felt in the last century or so. Who is anyone to say that tradition medicine, which has been around for centuries and has a much richer history, to be illogical?

Historically, medicine men protect their medication recipe with their lives and often bring those secrets to their graves. There is much jealousy and fear of secrets being stolen.

The greatest contribution of Modern Medication is perhaps its accreditation and information sharing. There is still much to uncover the traditional medicine, its application and its effect.

There is no right or wrong here. Modern or traditional…they are all experimental when come to an individual person. Just that we can believe what we believe and there is no reason to be critical of another person’s choice. We should learn more about this as part of our culture. Fortunately or unfortunately, human beings are on the top of the food chain. And we can consume the nature as it benefits us. As such, we should also treasure the nature that given us the natural remedies to our illnesses.

In the world of The Sims, this would be considered as an upgrade and I would gain more Happiness points. Well, it is smaller than the previous gift. To me, its just a functional device. Not that I watch so many DVDs that I require such an upgrade. But my darling is complaining that what if we have guests over. The previous one is getting a bit unstable and its not ‘cracked’ for modified DVDs…if you know what I mean.

Since I am at it, this DVD player comes with HDMI, which work with all flat screen television…I was told.  The wonderful reason for HDMI is that it uses only one cable to connect your player to your tv for both visual and audio.  There is no need to have separate output even to the surround sound system or amplifier.  So now I had an extra cable, the 3 head plug (white, red, yellow) thingie…Anyone need, let me know.

Along with all the well wishes, we are getting a large number of advice from parenting friends. So far, none of them are contradicting, so that is good. I guess babies are unique in their own little requirements, so we can listen with all intent, but there is really no real need to follow any one set of examples. Of coz, the preparation is necessary. Babies in Singapore are so lucky these days.

In preparation of things, I have been keeping Noodlez and Chewie informed of the coming of the new addition to the family. After all, they would be more restricted after the kid is born. I have also started to stock pile reading materials. Did you know the number of different milk powder formulae that is available out there far exceeds the different breeds of cows? We have also started to look around for baby stuff.. My wife’s friend gave her this list:

1) Things to buy – Baby

- baby cot, mattress, bed sheet, pillow, waterproof mattress protector and accessories

- baby dressing cum bath set

- milk bottle sterilizer

- Milk bottles and teats

- Cotton buds and cotton balls

- Water dish for cotton bud

- Shampoo and body bath

- Bath basin

- Baby soft bath towel, Face towel

- Diapers

- Baby blanket

- Baby clothes, mittens and booties

- Baby bibs

- Baby powder and lotion

- Safety pins

- Thermometer (the one that checks temperature through the ear)

- Food grinder (for use when older for baby’s food processing)

- Baby “Ru Yi” oil

- Nappy rash cream, Drapolean (think it’s spelt this way it’s purple and white colour with picture of baby infront)

- Baby cloth diaper – to use to wrap baby up when baby is home

- Baby changing table – for ease of change of diaper and dressing up to individual needs

- Glass bottles to store breast milk (if you are breast feeding, get from hospital which u r delivering. It’s free, ask the nursery room to keep for you. For the cover to the glass bottles, you can buy from Mt A. The glass bottles are the bottles that hospital uses to feed new born milk. These are samples from the formula companies)

- Baby “yao lan”

- Baby car seat

- Baby stroller

For breast feeding:

- breast pump (best electric pump – Medela and best manual pump – Avent)

- glass bottles

- cooler bag

- ice blocks

- Breast milk collector shield (available from Madela)

Personally, I have no qualms about using hand-me-downs, with exception to those items containing food. I dun even dare to imagine the kind of things my grandma may have kept since my babyhood days.

Talking about baby…I am still craving for the baby back ribs.

A lot of people is saying that we are working very fast. Well, we really didnt plan it. Here’s the baby first photos..

To be honest, if I am ever going to do any planning, I doubt that I will ever have a baby.  It is strange that we can easily say that we do not want a baby, but it takes much much more to decide to have a baby.

It took me approximately 7mins 21secs to learn about the news, broke out in cold sweat, panic for a while, acknowledge the reality and finally be happy about it.

I am really excited about this.  Worried…yes.  There are many things to consider.  But the more I think about it, the more worries there are.  And there isn’t any real solution at hand.  So we just need to brace for any expected and unexpected as they come.

Recently, I had a number of what I consider ‘Good news’ to share with people around me.  However, there seems to be no good news coming from the others.  I am not sure why.  Maybe bad news are more appealing.  I want to put down what I think we should all practice when it comes to dealing with issues.

1)  Talk to the relevant people.  Discuss the matter explicitly to the people involved rather than complaining about the matter openly ‘behind the relevant people backs’.

2)  Be passionate, but not emotional.  Now thats a fine line that even electrons will have problem treading.

3)  Facts are based on our own perspective.  Given a formula of X + Y = Z, it is never what is X and what is Y and the result is Z.  Its why is it X or Y, who/what is X or Y from and  who is to be blame for getting Z.  As the facts get passed on to people, the formula may become (X + Y)* n  = (Z * n).   So even if its a fact, get it from the source.  If the source says Z, then its Z.  Why guess so much?

4)  Difference between good gossip and bad gossip.  Good gossip is based on facts.  For example, I saw him and her walking into a hotel.  Bad gossip is based on deduction and assumption.  For example, I saw them walking into the hotel, they must had a humping good time.  We are not detectives, we will never get paid for any deduction.

5)  Opinion is like an asshole.  Everyone got one.  You cant stop people who want to drag your name through the mud.  Just distance yourself from them and hope that your true friends know you for who you are.

6)  Love is blind.  Relationship between 2 persons is always complicated with each of their own perspectives, we will never understand the relationship coz we are never there all the time.

I never say that I can do them.  I am just saying that this is good way to think about it.

Found this article interesting. Take it into context though, and there are exceptions.

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Sometimes it’s not what men say, but it’s their actions that are significant.

Once you understand the hidden language and actions of man talk, you’ll become far more secure in your dating and relationships.